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How to Sparkle Like a Sexy Momma | Pinay.com

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Ana Viajera

Your son is your world. I get it. So is mine. But there are other things in my world too, namely the rest of the family, friends, my career, my passions, and most of all, myself. Although I would do anything for my son, he is not necessarily the center of my world. At least, not all the time. And I believe that that will make him a better person, because of two reasons. The first reason is backed by an article from Quartz news outlet that says: “Children who are raised to believe that they are the center of the universe have a tough time when their special status erodes as they approach adulthood.”

Another reason why I don’t believe in a child-centric family is because parents who are happy and fulfilled makes for happy and fulfilled children. The science of raising happy kids according to Happify reveals that a mom’s satisfaction with her life is more important to a child’s social and emotional skills than her education, income, and career. The way I see it, I need to take care of myself first before I can make my boy truly happy.

And while motherhood is perhaps one of the most fulfilling careers there is, I believe that women are also meant to be other things: philanthropists, artists, leaders, and so on. But how does one become other than a mother when her chest is constantly leaking of breast milk and 10 loads of laundry are waiting to be done? A mother riddled with stretch marks can still be sexy as long as she is confident and happy. Follow the few steps to get you started on making the domestic diva in you shine:

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What happens to a child who is raised to think that he is the center of the universe when he faces the real world?

Act like you’re single again. Go on a monthly date-night with the hubby. Dress as if you’re on a first date. He sees you daily in a T-shirt; give him some eye candy by wearing a little black dress for a change. It will be easy to fall back into a conversation about the kids, but try not to. In fact, make a game out of it. The first person to say anything about the kids gets to do a deep cleaning of the garage. Go on a girl’s night out too. Act like you’re single, not by flirting with strangers, but by having a drink, wearing sexy shoes, and talking about sex instead of playdates.

Nurture a passion aside from your family. Yes, you love cooking for your family, but can find another thing that fulfills you and you alone like yoga. Learn to play an instrument or volunteer in a civic group.

Keep learning. Online courses now make it easy for mothers to go back to school. What should stop you from getting a master’s degree? And isn’t it about time for you to learn how to manage your phone instead of always relying on your teenager to do updates and fix minor bugs?

Be the woman that you want your daughter to be. Show her by example that although appearance is not everything, good grooming is a mark of a lady. You want to remind your child of the dangers of vanity, but you also want to foster her self-esteem by teaching her to take pride in her appearance. This means that even though you’re a stay-at-home mom, you don’t get to wear your pajamas the whole day.

Get your “me time” regularly. Every day, allow 30 minutes to yourself to have a cup of coffee and read without a toddler tugging at your sleeve. This means that dad or older sibling should take charge for a bit. And on some weekends, take a couple of hours for a salon or spa treatment.

Don’t base all your decisions around your child. It doesn’t make sense for you to sit through Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles when there are many family movies available that everyone in the family can enjoy. And instead of going to the same restaurant every time because your son would eat only their fried chicken and nothing else, try different places that everyone will enjoy. By doing so, you’re also encouraging your kids to be more adventures, eat healthy, and broaden their tastes.

Encourage independence. By spoon feeding them, not only are you stunting their growth, you’re also adding unnecessarily to your load. Train your little one to get dressed on his own. And urge them to help with chores. Assign specific responsibilities to each child. Even a toddler can handle picking up trash. This teaches them to be more independent and gives you an extra hand.

Ana Viajera

Ana Maria Lykes left her job as an editor-in-chief for AsianTraveler magazine and as a travel columnist for a local paper in the U.S. to answer to an even bigger boss: a demanding three-year-old. She continues to contribute for a few publications here and abroad while pixel stitching and light chasing. She has a bachelor’s degree in Computer Science, a master’s in Creative Writing, and a doctorate in potty training.

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